I was feeling creative this afternoon.
Nerds Rule!
12 Friday Sep 2008
Posted in Uncategorized
Monthly Archives: September 2008
Lackluster Job Searcher
11 Thursday Sep 2008
Posted in Life
This morning I was awaken by a phone call from a temp agency asking me to come in to interview. I was not excited. The truth is, my unemployed ass is tired. I’m tired of job searching, interviewing, and failing drug tests for dumb reasons. I’m tired of wasting my gas, getting dressed up for nothing, and sucking at phone interviews. If I compose one more cover letter, I’m going to scream!
(shakes fist at George Dub’ya Bush)
Damn you for driving our country’s economy into the ground!
Thanks to this horrible economy, I am competing against unemployed people with degrees. I can’t help but wonder if the economy would have recovered by the time I earn mine. Being a career student is starting to look better and better. Truth is, I’m slackin’ on my pimpin’. I’m sitting on a jewelry empire and a best selling book. My favorite professor was correct, Entrepreneurship is the key. It takes money to make money. Anybody feel like investing?
Yes, I made those.
Winter Collection 2008
The Miseducation of an Urban Nerd
10 Wednesday Sep 2008
Posted in The Miseducation of an Urban Nerd
Those “Nerd Nightmares” really inspired me to get my unemployed ass up and be productive. I’m currently writing a book. I plan to drop it by the end of September. It’s called:
The Miseducation of an Urban Nerd:
Every Student’s Guide to College
Every Student’s Guide to College
I figure, I’m an expert on this whole college thing so why not write a guide? I’ve been to 4 different schools in 4yrs, gotten tons of scholarship money, and am still pushing for a degree. Who better than me! Plus I want to become a motivational speaker at some point in my life. This is about the only thing I’m an expert in, so why not now? Every good motivational speaker sells a book. I’m trying to give back to the community, but no use in not using this as an opportunity to make a small profit while I’m at it. I’m about half done writing it and the cover is being designed as we speak. The above image can be found on the inside cover. I’m self-publishing…the internet, what a beautiful resource! The book will also be available for purchase both online and out of my trunk. Cop that, Cop that! I’ll keep you updated with the progress. Right now, I’m about to lay it down so I can start fresh in the morn’n. Much Love!
Nerd Nightmares
08 Monday Sep 2008
Posted in School
When I’m called an “Urban Nerd,” I embrace it. Nerds make the money and though often teased, we always seem to end up on top. What could possibly strike fear into the heart of an Urban Nerd such as myself? Having to compete with even bigger braniacs and not being prepared. Last night was filled with what I like to call…
Nerd Nightmares:
Nerd Nightmares:
The Cause: You all know I got my full tuition/fess scholarship reinstated (AFTER TWO YEARS) and plan to go back to Clark Atlanta University fall 2009. I have a bit of normal anxiety concerning my workload. I’ll be a junior, an honors program student, have to maintain my GPA, and will be living off campus. Each of these factors stresses me out in a different way. The biggest thing that freaks me out, is not being prepared.
The Nightmares: I dreamed I was in an Ivy League environment. All the geniuses from high school were present along with a hard up British teacher. To kick things off, I was late to class after discovering my car, Imani, was stolen. I had to explain the situation to the teacher and tell her I may be leaving class to take phone calls from my father as he tried to track down the car. The nightmare continues….
Un-characteristic of me, I searched for a seat in the back of the class. The teacher redirected me to the front row. We started taking notes. I couldn’t see the board, I didn’t have the right pen (I only write with Pilot G-2), I couldn’t even read her handwriting. It was a class teaching us how to Research, but for some reason she was talking about the configurings of the human hand. As the other braniacs fought to answer questions, I was completely lost. Had there been assigned reading for the first day that I missed?
The nightmare continues…
I went to the cafe’ where I saw the guy who stole my car. I don’t know how I knew it was him, but I knew. His name was Sunny, he was a white man with surfer type blonde hair. In true “Urban Nerd” fashion, I hit him with the butt of my gun in the back of the head. Got my damn car back and stressed over the cash to get the steering column fixed (it had been hot wired).
The nightmare continues…
I went to the bookstore to buy the four required books for that British lady’s class. That’s when I remembered my refund check hadn’t come yet. How the hell was I gonna afford them? Somehow I raised cash, stuffed the books in my backpack and headed back to my dorm room to study only to realize that I had no dorm room. I woke up wondering if I needed to buy a study room from the library (Club Woody), and weither or not I was truly ready to live off campus.
The nightmare ends.
50 Years, 3 Police Cars, 1 Flyy Gal
07 Sunday Sep 2008
Note: These are the Flyy ass pony haired shoes I wore during my evening of discovery
Tonight, I was truly FLYY. Gold metallic dress, handmade necklace, pony haired leopard shoes. I was dressed to the nines as always.
This evening I attended my “grandparent’s” 50th anniversary celebration (They are really my mom’s best friend’s parents, but they took me in as their grandchild at a very young age). I came to several relizations while there. First, I couldn’t help but wonder if I would find love that lasts a lifetime as they did. As the MC went around the room asking couples married 50+ years I took mental notes:
- Don’t be the one to walk away
- Women submit
- Live by your vows
- Men, say “yes ma’am”
It’s amazing how these couples live by such simple advice. People are out here spending tons of cash on therapists, books & relationship seminars when all they need to do is just love each other. Have people forgotten what it means to love? Those who know me, know I’m not a Bible fanatic, seeing as it was written AND edited by man during King James’ era, but it is the best instruction book I’ve ever seen concerning the subject of what love truly is.
Afterwards, I was pulled over by THREE, count ‘em, THREE police cars for making an illegal left turn in the Westport District. I know I have dark tints, but dammit – Am I really that Gangsta?!
The Apology
06 Saturday Sep 2008
Posted in School
Nothing really intriguing has happened to me today…the night is young & knowing me I could very possibly wind up committing 3 felonies in 4 states by the time the clock strikes midnight. Despite what the night holds for me, I can’t help but sit in my bed and think about my first love: Clark Atlanta University. I also can’t help but wonder what the hell happened to my “Apology Shirt.”
Here’s My Tribute:
Note: I’m feeling quite random right now so bear with me
- I’m sorry you’re not as flyy as me
- I’m sorry you can’t see the beauty in a plus sized woman
- I’m sorry it’s 2008 and you still won’t date a brown skinned woman
- I’m sorry you still think putting crack creme (relaxers) in your hair is cool
- I’m sorry you got so desperate to win that you chose a gun slangin’, inexperienced, woman you only met once to run beside you
- I’m sorry you’re 23 years older than Alaska
- I’m sorry you’re gonna loose
- I’m sorry you’re not a Clark Atlanta University student
- I’m sorry you think rounded circles in stepping is fine
- I’m sorry you can’t step as hard as me
- I’m sorry you can’t grill
- I’m sorry you don’t even know what a grill is
- I’m sorry you think you’ve had real BBQ
- I’m sorry you don’t realize Kansas City has the best BBQ
- I’m sorry you don’t know how to get hyphy, go dumb, or get stupid
- I’m sorry you don’t agree that “Thizz is what it is”
- I’m sorry you still use a PC
- I’m sorry your computer still gets viruses
- I’m sorry you can’t get down with reggae
- I’m sorry you think SouljaBoy is hip hop
- I’m sorry you don’t realize that I.Am.HipHop
- I’m sorry you don’t have a Nintendo Wii
- I’m sorry you can’t play Super Mario World or Super Mario 2 & 3
(Take A Breath…)
- I’m sorry your cell phone services aren’t free
- I’m sorry my cell phone has never been cut off
- I’m sorry you don’t know how to boil down chicken backs, throw in diced tomatoes, tomato sauce, mixed vegetables, and throw them in a pot with 2packs of Ramen Noodles to make a meal when you’re broke
- I’m sorry your DVD collection isn’t as extensive as mine
- I’m sorry you rely on MySpace to get dates
- I’m sorry I denied your friend request
- I’m sorry the only people who even know your record label exists are those you bombard on MySpace to add you as a friend
- I’m sorry no one wants to buy your shitty song for .99 cents
- I’m sorry there are still internet thugs
- I’m sorry internet groupies even exist
Name Droppin’ my Troubles Away
04 Thursday Sep 2008
Posted in Pain, Randomness
I woke up this morning in a “Crime Mobb” mood to say the least. Could I be disgruntled because I’m unemployed? Away from the majority of my friends? Living a celibate life? I have no idea what the root cause of it all is. It may just be a side effect from being stuck in the house all day with a 75yr old granny with dementia and a 52yr old clone of Sister Paterson. 1000 Thank You’s to whoever invented the door.
As I sit back and listen to Miss Rap Supreme’s: Ms Cherry talk about never being caught without her tool, I can’t help but wish I had one. In reality, I highly doubt I need one because then I’d really be quoting her “It’s wheneva bitch, It’s whateva hoe!” chorus. I’m really wishing I could blaze up right now. That way whatever is bothering me, I’d just say “fuck it” and move on. Unfortunately, that is no longer an option.
What options does that leave Her Royal Flyness? Hell, I don’t know. I’m actually asking you. Misery loves company so I’d love to bitch n moan with another disgruntled individual. (Random thought: We call Missouri, Mizery, meaning I live in a state of Mizery, does that give me the right to feel this way??) In the words of Bart Simpson in the Simpson’s Movie as he downed a pint of Jack Daniels: “I’m Troubled.”
Me, Racist?..Not Interested!
04 Thursday Sep 2008
I’m about as Colored as it gets…yes dammit, I said Colored. I grew up in an urban environment, attended public school, moved to the Black Mecca and attended one of the most illustrious HBCU’s in the nation. I’ve never dated outside my race, nor have I wanted to. Truth is, I am in love with Black Men. I love everything about em. Other Black women bitch, gripe and moan about how low down they can be but they fail to realize that dogs are not race exclusive. I pose the “Racist” question, because that’s what I was called countless times last night.
Here’s the story:
Last night I got bored so I perused some Yahoo chat rooms only to be bombarded with IMz. Some of them were from lil yuggins, a few were of age men, but the majority were Caucasion or from India. I couldn’t help but get annoyed. I’m curteous and actually a sweetheart if you sit and talk to me, but sometimes I just don’t feel like being bothered.
- I was called racist for not wanting to turn my webcam on.
- I was called racist for not wanting to view their webcam (why the hell would I want to see a man playing with his tiny pink ding-dong? Let me see your face!)
- I was called racist for replying that I had never dated outside of my race.
- I was called racist for not wanting to add these random guys to my friends list.
Give me a brown skinned, well hung, go getter! Tan White men need not apply. So let me pose the question again: Am I Racist? Hell No! I just know what I want, what I love & who I stand behind no matter what. I’m that ryde-or-die chick any man is blesed to have. It just so happens that I choose to roll with my African American brothaz.
Dear Mr. X:
02 Tuesday Sep 2008
Posted in Lessons Learned, Love, Pain
Thank you for letting me leave so easily. Thank you for allowing me to spread my wings and fly. Since leaving you I’ve regained my zest for life and feel like living. I’m happy now. I’ve lost 43 pounds since leaving you. I’m well on my way to good health. Mentally and Spiritually I’m doing just fine. I allowed you to lead me astray. I stuck by you even though you encouraged me to let my family drift away.
We blazed together. We laughed together. We shared some good times.
It all feels like a distant memory now. Perhaps it all went down in a dimension different than the one I’ve come to love. I prefer to keep my past behind me. That’s where you need to stay.
Smoking wasn’t a good look on me but you didn’t care. I supported your jobless ass, I paid the bills, I bought the food, I purchased the weed. Never again. You’ve taught me many life lessons, mainly what love is not. For that too I thank you, because ungrateful I am not. I’m grateful you didn’t put up a fight when I kicked you to the curb. I’m grateful you gracefully bowed out and called your mom. I’m grateful you never called me, and let that be the end.
PS: In case you’re wondering, I never shed a tear. I never sat and reminisced on what we used to share.
Labor Day: Are You Gay?
02 Tuesday Sep 2008
Posted in Life
Tags
Today of course is Labor Day, so me and my mom cooked for her friends. I took a video of the festive food!
(Gotta have the Louisiana hot sauce)
(Gotta have the Louisiana hot sauce)
The dinner guests consisted of me, my mom, my grandmother, my god mother & two women from the church. After dinner we got to talking about some current issues. First of all, it must be known that they are all 50+. The topic of gay marriage came up. I’m young and very liberal so I’m not totally against the idea. It was my first time even talking about with anyone, let alone old heads. Gay, Lesbian & Transgendered people totally gross them out. Being the hard core Christians they are, they said it was a spirit. They all agreed: “Yep, definitely a spirit.” Of course I’m respectful and also wise so I chose to keep my mouth shut for the most part, but I felt that was an unfair accusation. A person likes a person of the same sex, or feels they were born the wrong sex so they must be possessed by some sort of evil spirit. I was happy that one woman brought up the point of gender assignment and how some people really are assigned to the wrong gender at birth.
I’m Christian, but I hate seeing other Christians turn their noses up at people for committing a sin that we are actually unsure about. I feel that people should be able to do whatever the hell they like as long as it doesn’t stop my paycheck from coming. It’s not my place to pass judgment or tell you that you are surely going to hell. A girl I went to elementary school once said: “I chose to be gay the same day you chose to be straight.” That’s real. I’m not a lesbian so I have no idea what it feels like to be attracted to the same sex. Who am I to tell someone that they actively choose to like the same sex when in actuality, it was not a choice at all. I can’t prove that it’s not biological just like you can’t prove it’s spiritual.
Let people do what they do. Only God can judge them. Only God can judge me.
